Glasto is almost upon us… Sunday Plan

Sunday has to start with Breakfast with Howard Marks.  It’s tradition.  A bit like a church service what with it being Sunday and all that but with added drugs.  Next is either Status Quo at the Pyramid or Micachu and the Shapes.  Depending on whether I’m after a good old knees up, daft 2 chord mud dance or now I guess.  Other than Penguin Cafe Orchestra up in the Acoustic tent.  It might be worth a chill out up there with some real ale at this point as I predict by now I’ll be a shadow of my former self and will be in need of quiet if previous festivals are anything to go by.  Then it’s time to wander about for a bit until Yeah Yeah Yeah‘s take to the Other Stage followed by Bat For Lashes.  Then finish off with Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds and Blur at The Pyramid.  It was a toss up between Blur and Prodigy but I’m off to Leeds where I’ll be seeing them and with that another Glastonbury is over and done with.

At time of writing, the weather forecast is predicting rain.  Lets hope not eh…

Glasto is almost upon us… Saturday Plan

As I type this I do wonder if by now any of these plans have been followed.  I suspect that due to too much bodily abuse the plan will have been abandoned and at this point I’ll be in the Green Fields having a massage by a cow’s udder or something…  If not and I am managing to keep on keeping on, the plan for Saturday will go a little something like this;

VV Brown is on the Pyramid stage at 11:00.  Quite a large stage for a solo artist that but I’m sure, with her larger than large act, she’ll pull it off.  Rolf Harris follows over on the Jazz World Stage.  Get your wobbleboard out for the lads.    Back to the Pyramid to see Eagles Of Death Metal followed by Spinal Tap.   Then it’s a toss up between Hockey at John Peel Stage, Horace Andy at the Park or The Invisible at Guardian Lounge.  Depends on which is the furthest away or which way the straw poll amongst fellow team members works out I guess.  A quick stop to grab some food and drink then see Passion Pit at John Peel.  Amble over to the Pyramid to see Kasabian and then return to the Dance Village to firstly see DJ Yoda in Dance West and follwed by 2 Many DJs in Dance East.  If after this my legs can still hack it, a must see for me this year is the Hypnotic Brass Ensemble in Club Dada followed by Damon Albarn’s cast of thousands Africa Express.  Crikey.  Is it really 3:30?  Better get some shut eye…

Glasto is almost upon us… Friday Plan

First up today is Mr Hudson who, if the rumours are to be believed, will have Kanye West joining him.  Wonder if he’ll bring his speak and spell with him if he does turn up.  A short walk through the Dance Village to John Peel Stage where we can check out Dan Black.

Oooh.  Lunchtime.  Time for an Oggie methinks which can accompany the lengthy trek up to the Park to watch Golden Silvers then it’s either back to the John Peel Stage to see The Virgins or see who the Special Guest is on the Pyramid Stage.  Rumours have it that it will be N*E*R*D.  Might be worth it to hear Lapdance and Rock Star performed live.  Hmmm.

Return to The Other Stage for morose Joy Division wannabes White Lies followed by Friendly Fires.  No question that we’ll have to then watch The Specials on the Pyramid stage.  Following that we’ll be catching the end of The Streets‘ set on the Jazz World Stage who is then followed by must see Q-Tip.   That takes us to just after midnight.  Hopefully I’ll have enough energy left to watch Chipmunk and then The Nextmen at the Dance Lounge at which point it’ll be 3:00am and even I need my beauty sleep.

Glasto is almost upon us… Thursday plan

It’s nearly here so I may as well start planning my time there.  Not that Glastonbury plans are ever stuck to but you need some kind of battle plan before venturing onto the fields of Worthy Farm.

Maximo Park are kicking off the festival by staging a 2,000 capacity limit gig in the Queens Head.  Not sure I can be bothered with cramming in that tent so hopefully the promised screens will be up and a beer can help me take in their set.  Following them, again in the Queen’s Head is We Have Band.

A couple of hours for a wander about the site, taking in the weird and wonderful means you can take in the Groove Diggerz in at the fantastical berlesque Pussy Parlure speigeltent.  A quick skip across the way and you’re all set for a long haul at the Dance Lounge.  The cheese/well you’ve just got to see it to believe it/will Brian get run over by his own car on stage factor means you cannot miss East 17Raffertie‘s old skool rave meets dubstep, followed by Beardyman‘s supreme beatboxing, followed by the Unabombers and before you know it it’s 00:30.   Which means surely it’s got to be time for the obligatory trip up the stone circle to oversee the City of Glastonbury before heading back to the Dance Lounge and finishing off with Altern-8.  There’s something you simply cannot overlook. It’d be rude.  Top One Nice One Get Sorted. Now, where did I put that face mask and hoody.  🙂

Glasto 2009 Line Up

Glastonbury 2009 is just over 5 weeks away and apparently this gal claims that “In 2005, 2007, and 2008 this site brought you 90% of ALL the acts on the Pyramid (even the little ones!), and loads of the headliners on every stage!”. That’s a hefty line up she’s claiming to be party to.

Of the confirmed I’m jizzing my pants about the following;

Deadmau5 – confirmed in news article
The Qemists – listed on MySpace
Mr Scruff – in the Dance area on Sunday
Streetlife DJs – playing on Thursday
2ManyDJs – playing on Saturday
Erol Alkan – playing on Friday
Jarvis Cocker – hinted to a fan in Paris
Ray Davies – listed for the acoustic stage
Dizzee Rascal – told Radio 1
DJ Yoda – according to MySpace
Doves – now confirmed
Eagles of Death Metal – now confirmed
Friendly Fires – told a fan
Kasabian – now confirmed
Krafty Kuts – playing on Saturday
La Roux – confirmed on Radio 1
Little Boots – according to NME
Maccabees – confirmed on Soccer AM
Madness – confirmed by Suggs
Noisettes – told DigitalSpy they are playing
Passion Pit – confirmed on Radio 1
Peaches – listed on MySpace
Penguin Cafe Orchestra – playing on Sunday
Q-Tip – told Radio 1
Shit Disco – in Dance Village
The Specials – now confirmed, playing Friday
Spinal Tap – thanks for the avalanche of emails!
The Virgins – will be on the John Peel Stage

And this is just funny

East 17 – in the Dance Village on Thursday

Glastonbury Recap. Part 2 – Saturday, Sunday

Saturday begins with a bleary noggin, a bacon and brie baguette, coffee and a nice relaxed audience with everyone’s favourite convicted drug smuggler Howard Marks. Despite technical difficulties he managed to soldier on and regaled the crowd with tales of vicious inmates, machete wielding killers and hallucinogenic toads. A thoroughly enjoyable session and the perfect calming cure following the previous nights excess. He tours often so try and catch him if you can. Swiftly followed by one of the best Milkshakes I’ve ever had, were The Bees on the Jazz World who were great despite the rain coming down again. Wash in the rain, Chicken Payback and especially A Minha Menina guaranteed that the rain and mud would soon be forgotten all about. After a quick beer stop, we get ready for CSS. They turn out to be as mad as a box frogs, particularly the lead singer Lovefoxx who was sporting a catsuit so bright she must be visible from space. One of the highlights of the festival for sure. After standing in the rain for the entire duration of CSS’ set we chose to take shelter in the Pussy Parlor where all kinds of circus acts, dancing girls, acrobatics and burlesque thing were happening. A Square Pie fills a much needed hole and supplies us with the energy required for DJ Yoda. Often touted as one of the DJs you must see before you die, he certainly lived up to the hype. He was on top form, mixing Star Wars and Muppet Show theme tunes alongside Bob Marley, Johnny Cash and plenty scratching and hip hop beats. You find a track list let me have it. We stuck around for the beginning of Mark Ronson’s DJ set which sounded good but jettisoned that for some drinks and a freshen up in readiness for Mr Scruff’s headlining set. It’s the first time I’ve seen Mr Scruff and as DJ Yoda, he’s also touted as another DJ you must see before you die. His set was absolutely top draw. Highlight of the whole festival. The set was accompanied with a big screen telling the crowd to “Hold on to your tent pegs”, “That is a prize winning marrow of a bassline” “Wobble Your Wellies”. Piss funny. If you want a taste of what the set was like pick up his Solid Steel Mix CD on Ninja Tune. It’s aces…..but not as good as his live set ; )

Sunday we managed to catch the tail end of the next big things, The Enemy who sounded like they will be the next big thing. Breakfast and a beer was soundtracked by Cold War Kids who were adequate. If you saw their recent set on Later With Jools Holland, it was ten times better than that. Next was a trip to the Green Fields for a calm moment as I was feeling ropey. A copy of the Guardian and sit down sorted me out but we were enticed into a tent which was oozing some trippy 70’s synth space rock. It happened to be a hippy armed with a guitar and a synth and he wasn’t afraid to use them. That was provided members of the crowd got themselves on the tandem bike which was powering the electrics for the tent. Considering I’d just managed to pull myself out of a semi-hangover I passed on that one. So in an effort to ditch the hangover we headed over to the Queen’s Head next to the Other Stage for some more beer and to watch the tail-end of The Rakes. They were joined by Kate Jackson of Wakefield / Sheffield group the Long Blondes to perform Johnny Cash’s and June Carter’s Jackson and also did the great 22 Grand Job. Mika followed The Rakes and he was better than expected to be honest. Quite a talent that fella even when joined by a whole load of fancy dress animals for his final song. Good job I wasn’t on acid like some of the festival goers. That would have sent me over the edge. The Go! Team followed and they were superb as expected. We caught the first few songs of The View but had to leave. We weren’t ever going to miss the chance to see Pendulum do a live set and they nearly blew the roof off the Dance East tent. Astonishing. They even had the balls to cover The Prodigy’s (their spiritual forefathers) Voodoo People with aplomb. If you don’t own their album “Hold Your Colour” then you should. Fact. After having our heads blown off we trundled back to the Other Stage to see the Chemical Brothers bring the festival to a close. As usual they delivered the goods with a fantastic set complete with a fantastic light show complete with unnerving clowns and quality lasers. The only one small tiny gripe was that the set seems to end suddenly with no encore either. Very strange for the final night. Maybe they’d come too close to the curfew and had to wind it up.

And so another brilliant Glastonbury Festival of Contemporary Performing Arts comes to an end. Roll on 2008 !

Glastonbury Recap. Part 1 – Wednesday, Thursday, Friday

177,494 people, me and six friends have once again braved the elements to experience another fantastic yet muddy Glastonbury festival. I’m beginning to think Mother Nature has a serious problem with one particular weekend in June.

The whole shebang started of swimmingly on Wednesday evening. A late midnight arrival to Worthy Farm didn’t result in any serious darkness erection issues. The planned camping spot behind the railway track clearly wasn’t going to happen. It seemed that everyone had decided to turn up on the Wednesday instead of usual Thursday so a quick shufty around the new Dairy camping area was required. Near the toilets? Nah. Near bacon stall? Nah. We had a vegetarian in our midst. A few hundred metres and the large green uncamped area fit the bill. The tents were up in 30 mins even with the Stella flowing. A few more beers (a lot more actually) and it’s time to get some shut eye.

Thursday and it’s exploring time. Up to Lost Vagueness for some wierdness, across to the Avalon field to gaze longingly at the dry, comfortable Tipis, through the Circus and Cabaret to the Jazz World Stage for a beer. Pear cider had to do as strangely that was the only alcohol on sale… It was bloody strong though. A quick Pyramid Stage appreciation moment and we made ourselves comfortable outside the Queen’s Head for more alcoholic enjoyment. Many drinks later and it’s the obligatory trip up the stone circle for peace and calm and and we end the night in a hazy serene fashion.

Friday and now the rain comes as does the mud but the Dunkirk spirit kicks in and everyone just gets on with the task at hand, drinking and watching music. First band on the other stage is Mr Hudson and the Library. I couldn’t quite make out the library but I did see a band do a good set and cheer up the crowd in the process. Next up, Reverend and the Makers. This was the third time I’ve seen them and they just get better every time. The Reverend was on top form. A walking soundbite. “We’re Reverend and the Makers and we’re here to blow your heads off!” He threatened to nick Bjork’s monitors. Dedicated Armchair Detective to “bands who don’t want to speak out for fear of alienating their audience. Your band not a business. Think about it!” A great great band, who in my opinion, the only way is up. The rain and a need to locate a beer means we take shelter in the Bread and Rose beer tent. This means we miss fellow Wakefielders, The Cribs, but bump into friends from Wakefield instead. Many beers later and seeing Pritchard from Dirty Sanchez we take in the crazy sounds of Ralph Myerz and the Jack Herren Band in the Dance East tent. A “quick walk” up the new Park area means we end up missing Chas and Dave due to toilet queues but I did end up seeing a man in a boat up a tree dangling a basket for you to put wishes in. Only in Glastonbury eh? One wish later and a trundle past a mid-set The Coral to dance like a nutter to Simian Mobile Disco. If you don’t own their album, Attack Decay Sustain Release, well you should. Get it now. Right now. Next up were Kasabian and headliners Arctic Monkeys at the Pyramid Stage. Both brilliant classic-ridden sets if somewhat jarring energy forces on stage. An excellent end to another fun filled Glastonbury day. To be continued…

p.s. Don’t bug me about Glastonbury photos. They’re on their way ! Failing that add me on Facebook as they’re up there. : )